Chapter 15: Your Own Evening Practice

Tonight's Lesson

Good evening, and welcome to our fifteenth and last lesson. Please take your seat in the way you now know well: feet on the floor, weight on the sitting bones, shoulders soft. In our last lesson we practised kind wishes and remembered three good things from the day, two quiet ways of softening the mood before sleep. I hope some of you have tried them in bed, too. Tonight we bring the whole course together.

Over fourteen evenings you have learned a great deal, even if it may not feel that way. You have learned how to set up a safe chair, what happens when we sleep, how to use the breath as a bridge to rest, how to sit well, and how to move the neck, shoulders, jaw, spine, legs, feet, hands and arms gently. You have learned to pay attention with an anchor, to scan the body, to meet worries at night, to shape the evening hours, to handle waking in the night, and to end the day with kindness. That is a full toolbox for the evening.

Tonight's lesson is about making this practice your own, so that it can continue after the course ends. First I will explain how to build your own thirty-minute sequence from what you have learned. Then we will talk about keeping the practice going in real life: on tired days, sick days and nights away from home, with a simple sleep notebook, and together with a partner or family member. After that we will do our last full practice together, from arriving all the way to bed.

Building Your Own Thirty Minutes

The first thing to keep is the shape. Every practice in this course has had the same five parts: Arriving for about three minutes, Breathing for about five, Moving for about twelve, Stillness for about seven, and Closing and going to bed for about three. This shape is now familiar to your body and mind. When you sit down and begin to arrive, part of you already knows that the evening is turning toward rest. I suggest that you keep these five parts, even as the content inside them changes.

Within each part, you can choose from the lessons. For Arriving, you might use the posture from our fourth lesson, finding the middle with a small rocking movement, or simply noticing the chair and the floor. For Breathing, you might use your hands on the belly and ribs and count in for four and out for six, or just let the breath out be a little longer than the breath in. For Stillness, you might count breaths to ten, do a body scan, notice thoughts as they pass, or say kind wishes and remember three good things. For Closing, you might move your fingers and toes, open your eyes slowly and go straight to bed.

The Moving part offers the most choice. A balanced evening sequence usually includes something for each area of the body: the neck and shoulders, the spine, the hips, legs and feet, and the hands and arms. Here is one simple pattern you can follow. Begin at the top with slow nods, turning the head and shoulder rolls. Then move the spine with seated cat and cow, side bends and a gentle twist to each side. Then the lower body: marching the knees, ankle circles, pointing and flexing the feet. Then the hands: wrist circles and a short self-massage. End with a gentle forward bend if it suits you, coming up slowly with the head last.

Within that pattern, let the body guide your choices. If your neck and shoulders are tight after a day at a screen, you can spend more of the twelve minutes on the neck, shoulders and jaw from our fifth lesson. If your legs feel heavy or restless after a day of standing, give more time to the lower body from our seventh lesson. If your hands are tired from typing, carrying or cooking, add the finger stretches and arm reaches from our eighth lesson. The total time stays about the same; only the balance changes.

A common question is, "Should I change the sequence every night to keep it interesting?" For sleep, repetition is a friend. A sequence that is the same, or nearly the same, each evening becomes a signal that the day is ending, and you do not have to think about what comes next. Many people find it useful to choose one main sequence and keep it for several weeks, changing only small parts when the body asks for it. You may want to write your sequence on a card or in your notebook and keep it by your chair.

Keeping the Practice Through Real Life

There will be tired evenings, when even thirty minutes feels like too much. On those evenings, keep the shape but make it smaller. Sit down, arrive for a minute, breathe slowly for a few minutes, do one or two movements that your body enjoys, sit still for a little while and go to bed. Even a few minutes of slow breathing in the chair is a real practice. What matters most is the habit of turning toward rest, not the number of movements you complete.

On days when you are unwell, with a cold, a fever or a body that aches, rest comes first. You do not need to do the moving part at all. If you feel like it, you can sit or lie comfortably and simply breathe with a slightly longer breath out, or do a short body scan in bed. When you feel better, return to the practice gently, with smaller movements for the first few evenings. If you are unsure whether a movement suits you, ask a doctor.

On nights away from home, almost any sturdy chair will do. Before you begin, check it in the same way we did in our first lesson: it should be stable, without wheels, not a folding chair that could fold, and standing on a floor that does not slip. If the seat is too high for your feet to rest flat, place a thickly folded towel or blanket under your feet. If you cannot find a safe chair, do the breathing and the stillness sitting on the edge of the bed or lying down, and leave out the moving part for that night.

For the next few weeks, you might like to keep a simple sleep notebook. Each morning, write a few short notes: about what time you went to bed and got up, how the night felt to you in a word or two, whether you did the practice and which parts, and anything else that seemed to matter, such as a late meal or caffeine in the afternoon. Write these notes in the morning from memory, not by checking the clock during the night. After a few weeks, read the notes back. You may notice patterns, such as which parts of the practice seem to help most. If you ever talk to a doctor about your sleep, the notebook can help you describe your nights clearly.

You can also share the practice with a partner or a family member. One person can read the steps aloud slowly from this book while the other practises, and then you can change roles on the next evening. Or you can both practise side by side, each in your own chair, with one person quietly saying the minutes. Keep the voices soft and do not compare your movements; every body is different, and each person moves only as far as is comfortable for them. A shared practice can become a calm way to end the day together.

Finally, how do you keep going? Link the practice to something you already do each evening, such as putting away the dishes or changing into comfortable clothes, so that one leads naturally to the other. Keep the chair in the same place, ready to use. And if you miss an evening, or a week, simply begin again the next evening without blaming yourself. A practice is not something that can be lost. It is always waiting for you, as near as the next chair.

The Thirty-Minute Practice

Let us prepare for our last full practice together. Set your sturdy chair on a non-slip floor, ideally with its back against a wall, with your feet flat on the floor or on a folded blanket. Wear comfortable clothes, dim the lights, and place a glass of water nearby. Tonight's practice gathers movements from the whole course. As always, move only as far as is comfortable. If you feel pain, dizziness or shortness of breath, stop, come out of the movement slowly and rest with your hands on your thighs, simply breathing.

Minutes 1 to 3: Arriving. Sit toward the front half of the seat. Rock gently forward and back a few times, then a little from side to side, and let the movement grow smaller until you come to rest in the middle, the weight even on both sitting bones. Let your feet rest flat with your knees about over your ankles. Let your spine grow long, your head balance on top and your shoulders soften. Rest your hands on your thighs and close your eyes, or look softly at the floor. Notice the chair holding you. You have arrived.

Minutes 4 to 8: Breathing. Rest one hand on your belly and the other on the side of your ribs. Breathe in through the nose and feel both hands move gently outward; breathe out and feel them move back in. When you are ready, begin to count: in for four, out for six, or a shorter count that feels easy. Never hold the breath. If counting makes you tense, let it go and simply breathe out a little more slowly than you breathe in. In the last minute, rest your hands on your thighs and let the breath be natural.

Minutes 9 to 20: Moving. Begin with the face and neck. Let your jaw soften so that the teeth part a little and the tongue rests easily, and let the skin around your eyes soften. Then breathe out and lower your chin a little toward your chest, and breathe in to bring the head back to the middle, five times. Turn your head slowly to the right as you breathe out and back as you breathe in, then to the left, three times each side. Let your right ear tilt toward your right shoulder for two breaths and come back to the middle, then do the same to the left. Never drop the head far back.

Now the shoulders and arms. Breathe in and lift your shoulders toward your ears; breathe out and let them drop, three times. Roll them slowly backward five times and forward five times. Then, on a breath in, lift both arms out to the sides and up, only as high as is comfortable, and on a breath out lower them slowly to your thighs. Do this four times. If the shoulders feel tight, lift one arm at a time.

Next, the spine. With your hands on your knees, do seated cat and cow: on a breath in let the chest move gently forward and up, and on a breath out round the back softly, with the chin moving toward the chest, for six breaths. Then the seated side bend: left hand on the seat beside you, lift the right arm on a breath in and lean a little to the left on a breath out, staying for two breaths; come back slowly and repeat on the other side. Then the gentle twist: right hand on your left knee, left hand resting on the seat beside you, breathe in to grow long and breathe out to turn slowly toward the left from the middle of the back, the head following last. Stay for three breaths, come back, and repeat to the right. The hands only rest; they never pull.

Now the legs and feet. March the knees slowly, ten times on each side. Lift the right foot slightly, or keep the toes on the floor, and circle the ankle five times each way; then point and flex the foot five times. Repeat with the left foot. Straighten the right leg with the heel on the floor for three breaths, bend it back, and do the same with the left. If it is comfortable for you, rest your right ankle on your left thigh, just above the knee, for a gentle figure-four and sit tall for three breaths; if not, simply rest the right ankle in front of the left foot. Come out slowly and change sides.

Last, the hands and a forward bend. Circle the wrists five times each way, open the fingers wide and close them softly five times, and press gently with each thumb over the palm of the other hand. Then move your feet a little wider than your hips, breathe out and let your upper body lean forward slowly, sliding your hands toward your knees or shins only as far as is comfortable. Stay for three breaths. Place your hands on your thighs and roll up slowly, bringing your head up last. Sit for a moment and notice how you feel before going on.

Minutes 21 to 27: Stillness. Shift back so that your back rests against the chair back, and close your eyes. For the first minutes, let the breath be your anchor and count breaths out from one to ten, then start again at one; if you lose count, simply start again, without any blame. Then let the counting go and move your attention slowly up through the body, from the feet to the top of the head, resting a breath or two in each place. In the last minutes, say kind wishes silently: "May I rest well tonight. May everyone rest well," and remember one good thing from today, or from this course.

Minutes 28 to 30: Closing. Let the breath become a little fuller. Move your fingers and toes gently. Open your eyes slowly and let them get used to the soft light. Notice the chair under you once more, the same chair that has carried you through these evenings. Stand up slowly, using the chair for support if you need it. Drink a little water if you like, turn off the lights and go to bed, letting the calm of the practice come with you.

Going On From Here

A common question at the end of a course is, "Should I go back to the first lesson and start again?" You can, and many people find that the lessons feel different the second time, because the body and the breath are now familiar. You might also read only the chapter that fits a particular need, such as the lesson on waking in the night after a few restless nights, or the lesson on worries during a busy week. Each chapter's summary is there to help you find what you need quickly.

Another common question is whether to join a class. If you would like to learn more, a class for beginners or a chair yoga class with a qualified teacher can be a good next step. A teacher in the room can see how you move and help you adjust movements to your own body. You can bring what you have learned here: the rule of comfort, the longer breath out, and the habit of moving slowly. And if sleep problems ever last for weeks and affect your days, remember that a doctor is the right person to talk to.

Before we finish, I would like to thank you for coming, evening after evening, and for being patient with your body, your breath and your wandering mind. You did not need to be flexible or fit to do any of this, and you never will. You only needed a chair, a little time and the willingness to slow down. That willingness is now yours to keep.

From tomorrow evening, the practice belongs to you. Some nights it will feel easy and calm, and some nights you will only manage a few slow breaths, and both are part of it. Whenever you sit down in your chair in soft light and let the breath out become a little longer, you are already practising. I wish you many quiet evenings and restful nights. Thank you, and good night.

Summary

Keep the five parts of the practice: Arriving, Breathing, Moving, Stillness, and Closing and going to bed. The familiar shape itself tells the body and mind that the day is ending.

Build your own sequence by choosing from the lessons, with something for the neck and shoulders, the spine, the legs and feet, and the hands, and let the body guide the balance.

Repetition helps sleep. Choose one main sequence and keep it for several weeks, changing only small parts when you need to.

On tired days make the practice smaller; on sick days rest first; on nights away from home, check that any chair is sturdy and safe before you use it.

A simple sleep notebook, kept for a few weeks and written in the morning, can show you patterns and help you describe your nights clearly.

You can share the practice with a partner or family member, reading the steps aloud and moving only as far as is comfortable for each person.

If you miss an evening, simply begin again. The practice is always waiting for you, as near as the next chair and the next slow breath.