Chapter 12: The Evening Hours

Tonight's Lesson

First, sit quietly for a moment, just as we will in the practice. Last evening we talked about worries that come at night. We used a notebook earlier in the evening, practised noticing a thought as a thought, found kind words to say to ourselves, and in the stillness we watched thoughts pass like clouds or cars. I hope some of you found that the notebook made the evening a little lighter.

Tonight we step back and look at the whole evening around our practice. Thirty minutes in a chair is a gift to the body and mind, but those thirty minutes sit inside the rest of the evening and the rest of the day. What we eat and drink, how bright our rooms are, what we do on our screens, and even when we get up in the morning all affect how easily we fall asleep. These habits are often described as the conditions for sleep. None of them is a strict rule, and no one gets all of them right every night.

I will explain the main evening habits that public health information about sleep often suggests, why each one matters, and how they fit with our practice. Then we will practise in dim light, with a slower moving part, and with a longer closing that leads you straight from the chair into bed. My hope is that by the end of tonight, the practice will feel less like a separate activity and more like the natural last part of your evening.

Light, Screens and What We Take In

Let us start with light, because light is the strongest signal for the body clock. In Chapter 2 we learned that the body clock is an inner rhythm that roughly follows the cycle of day and night. Bright light, especially in the morning, tells the clock that the day has begun. Darkness in the evening tells it that night is coming and that it is time to prepare for sleep. When our evenings are filled with bright overhead lights, the clock receives a confusing message, as if the day were still going on.

So the first habit is to let the evening grow dimmer. In the last hour or two before bed, you might turn off bright overhead lights and use one or two lamps with a soft, warm light instead. This is one reason we always practise in soft light. The other half of this habit happens in the morning: getting daylight soon after waking, by opening the curtains, sitting near a window, or stepping outside for a few minutes. Morning light and evening dimness work together, and each makes the other stronger.

Screens deserve their own mention. Phones, tablets, computers and televisions give off light close to our eyes, but light is only one part of their effect. They are also designed to hold our attention: one more message, one more video, one more piece of news. This keeps the mind in its busy mode just when we want it to slow down. A helpful habit is to choose a point in the evening when screens are put away, for example at the start of your practice, and not to bring them back afterwards. Many people find this easier if the phone is charged in another room, with a simple alarm clock beside the bed if one is needed.

Next, caffeine. Caffeine is found in coffee, in many kinds of tea, in some soft drinks and energy drinks, and in smaller amounts in chocolate. It helps us feel alert by holding back some of the signals of sleepiness that build up through the day. The effect of caffeine can last for many hours, so a cup in the afternoon may still be active when you go to bed. If you enjoy caffeine, it often helps to keep it to the earlier part of the day. In the evening, warm water or a caffeine-free herbal drink can be a pleasant part of winding down.

Let us also talk, gently, about alcohol and late meals. Alcohol can make us feel sleepy at first. However, it tends to make sleep lighter and more broken later in the night, so we may wake more often and feel less rested in the morning. A large or heavy meal close to bedtime can also make it harder to settle, because the body is still busy digesting while we lie down. If you can, have your main evening meal a few hours before bed. If you are hungry later, a small, light snack is usually better than going to bed hungry. None of this is about being perfect; it is about noticing what helps your own sleep.

One small note about drinks in general. A glass of water near your chair is part of our practice, and it is good to drink enough through the day. In the last hour before bed, though, small sips are usually enough, so that you are less likely to wake in the night needing the bathroom. Like the other habits, this is something to adjust to your own body, not a rule to worry about.

The Bedroom, the Morning and the Shape of the Evening

Now the bedroom. Most people sleep best in a room that is cool, dark and quiet. Cool means comfortably cool, not cold: enough covers to feel warm in bed while the air around you is fresh. Dark can mean thick curtains, a blind, or a soft eye mask if light comes in from outside. Quiet can mean closing a window, using soft earplugs, or a steady, gentle background sound if sudden noises bother you. It also helps if the bed is used mainly for sleep, rather than for work or long hours of screen time, so that the body learns to link the bed with rest.

There is one habit that surprises many beginners, because it happens in the morning: getting up at about the same time every day. A regular time to get up gives the body clock a strong, steady starting point. It also allows sleepiness to build up in a regular way through the day, so that it is ready for you at night. The hardest moment for this habit is the morning after a poor night, when we would like to stay in bed much longer. Even then, it usually helps to get up at your regular time, or only a little later, and to let the next night's sleepiness do its work. Staying in bed for a long time in the morning can make the next evening's sleep come later.

Now let us think about where the practice belongs in the evening. In most of our lessons, I have suggested the hour before bed. More exactly, a good time is often after the evening meal has settled, after the main tasks of the day are done, and after the notebook from the last lesson, if you use it. The practice then becomes a bridge between the day and the night. Try not to practise straight after a heavy meal, and try not to leave it so late that you are already struggling to stay awake in the chair.

It also helps to keep the practice the same each night: the same chair, the same place, roughly the same time, the same five parts. This sameness may sound dull, but for sleep it is a strength. The body and mind learn patterns. When the lights go down, the chair is ready, and the first slow breath begins, the body starts to recognise the signal that rest is coming. Over the weeks, the practice can become a sign that sleep is near, in the same way that brushing your teeth or putting on warm socks can.

A simple way to put all of this together is to think of the evening in three steps. First, the dimming: lights lowered, the main meal finished, screens put away, and the bedroom prepared, with the curtains closed and the bed turned down. Second, the practice: thirty minutes in the chair, in soft light. Third, bed: walking from the chair straight to bed, without anything bright or busy in between. You do not need to follow this exactly. Even one of these steps, done regularly, can make the evening calmer.

The Thirty-Minute Practice

Tonight we practise in dimmer light than usual, with a slower moving part and a longer closing. Before you begin, prepare your bedroom: close the curtains, turn down the bed, let the room become comfortably cool, and put your phone away in another room. Then set up your sturdy chair without wheels on a non-slip floor, ideally against a wall, with your feet flat on the floor or on a folded blanket or firm block. Use only one small lamp, enough to see safely but no more. Wear comfortable clothes and warm socks, and keep a glass of water nearby. As always, if you feel pain, dizziness or shortness of breath, stop, rest and breathe normally, and come out of every movement slowly.

Minutes 1 to 3: Arriving. Sit down slowly. Place your feet flat on the floor, about hip-width apart, the knees roughly over the ankles. Let your weight rest on your sitting bones, the spine long without stiffness, the shoulders soft, and the hands resting on the thighs. Let your eyes take in the dim room for a moment: the soft lamp, the shadows, the quiet. Then close your eyes or lower your gaze to the floor. Notice that the day is behind you now. There is nothing more to do this evening except this practice and then sleep.

Minutes 4 to 8: Breathing. Breathe through the nose if that is comfortable, letting the belly and ribs move. For the first minute, simply notice the breath as it is. Then let the breath out become slightly longer than the breath in: in for a count of four, out for a count of six, or a shorter count such as in for three and out for four. Do not hold the breath at any point. If counting makes you tense, let it go and breathe naturally. Tonight, let each breath be a little slower than usual, as though the breath, too, is getting ready for sleep. Continue for about four minutes.

Minutes 9 to 18: Moving. Tonight every movement is slower than usual and is repeated fewer times, with more rest in between. We start with the neck, from Chapter 5. Sit tall with your hands on your thighs. On a breath out, slowly tilt your right ear toward your right shoulder, only as far as is comfortable, keeping the shoulders down and soft. Stay for two slow breaths. On a breath in, bring the head back to the centre. Do the same to the left. Then lower the chin slowly toward the chest on a breath out and raise it to level on a breath in, three times. Rest for two breaths, noticing the neck.

Next, the spine, from Chapter 6. Place your hands on your knees. On a slow breath in, lift the chest gently forward and up into the cow, the chin staying level and the head not dropping back. On a slow breath out, round the back softly into the cat, the chin coming toward the chest. Let each movement take the whole length of the breath. Do this four times. Then sit tall and, with your hands resting on your thighs, turn gently to the right on a breath out, starting the turn from the spine, with the hands only resting. Stay for two breaths and come back to the centre on a breath in. Repeat to the left. Rest for two breaths.

Now the legs, from Chapter 7. Sit tall, holding the sides of the seat lightly if you wish. Slide your right foot forward along the floor until the leg is nearly straight, with the heel resting on the floor and the knee soft, never locked. Slowly point the toes away from you on a breath out and draw them back toward you on a breath in, three times. Then slide the foot back so that it rests flat again. Do the same with the left leg. Then, with both feet flat, lift the right knee a little on a breath in and lower it on a breath out, then the left, marching very slowly, four times on each side. Let the feet rest and notice their weight on the floor.

Last, the hands, from Chapter 8. Rest your forearms on your thighs, with the hands free. Make three slow wrist circles in each direction. Then spread the fingers on a breath in and let them close gently on a breath out, three times. Finally, hold one hand in the other and gently press your thumb in small circles into the palm, then along each finger, for a few breaths. Change hands. Let both hands rest on your thighs, palms up, and take two or three quiet breaths. If at any time you feel like doing less, do less; sitting and breathing is always a full practice.

Minutes 19 to 25: Stillness. Lean back against the chair back if that is comfortable, with the feet flat on the floor. Close your eyes or let your gaze rest on the floor. Let your attention settle on the breath, the anchor we learned in Chapter 9. Feel the belly rising and falling. If you like, count breaths from one to ten, and start again at one whenever you lose count or reach ten. When the mind wanders to the day, to tomorrow, or to anything else, notice where it went and kindly return to the breath. For the last two minutes, let go of counting and let your attention widen to the whole body sitting in the chair, heavy and at ease, in the quiet room.

Minutes 26 to 30: Closing. Tonight the closing is longer, and it ends in bed. Take two fuller breaths. Gently move your fingers and toes. Open your eyes slowly. Take a small sip of water if you like. Then place your hands on your thighs or the seat and stand up slowly, pausing for a moment until you feel steady. Turn off the lamp, or leave only a very small light on for the way, and walk slowly to the bedroom. Do not pick up a screen or turn on any bright light. Everything you need is already prepared.

Lie down in bed and settle into a comfortable position. Let the covers rest on you. Take three slow breaths with the breath out a little longer than the breath in. Then begin the short body scan from Chapter 10: feet and legs, hips and back, belly and chest, hands, arms and shoulders, and finally the face, with a few slow breaths at each place. If a worry appears, name it softly, "there is a worry," and return to the body. When you reach the face, let the jaw soften and the eyes rest. You might say silently a few kind words: "The day is done. I can rest now." Then let go of all the practice, and simply let sleep come in its own time.

Making It Fit Your Evening

Some of you have evenings that do not follow a neat pattern: late work, children who wake, or a household that stays busy and bright. You do not need to change everything at once. Choose one habit that seems easiest, perhaps dimming the lights in one room, or putting the phone in another room at bedtime, and keep it for a week or two before adding another. Small changes that last are worth more than big changes that are dropped after a few days.

If you share your home with others who stay up later, you can still create a quiet time for yourself. Practise in a calmer room, use soft earplugs if noise is a problem, and explain kindly to the people you live with that this half hour helps you sleep. Some people find that a partner or family member would like to join them. If not, a closed door and a soft lamp are enough.

A common question is, "I had coffee in the afternoon, or I ate late tonight. Is there any point in practising?" Yes. The practice is helpful on every kind of evening, including the ones that did not go as planned. Simply notice what happened, perhaps make a small note to try something different tomorrow, and practise as usual. There is no need to blame yourself. Each evening is a fresh start.

Another question is about weekends and days off: "Can I stay in bed much longer when I have the chance?" It is natural to want extra sleep, and a little extra now and then is fine. Very late mornings, however, can shift the body clock so that the next night's sleep comes later, which makes the start of the week harder. If you can, keep your time of getting up within a similar range on all days, and if you feel very tired, go to bed a little earlier rather than getting up much later.

Summary

Light is the strongest signal for the body clock. Let the evening grow dim with soft lamps, and seek daylight soon after waking.

Screens keep both the eyes and the mind busy. Choose a point in the evening to put them away, for example at the start of your practice, and keep the phone outside the bedroom if you can.

The effect of caffeine can last for many hours, so keep it to the earlier part of the day. Alcohol and heavy meals late in the evening can make sleep lighter or harder to begin.

A cool, dark, quiet bedroom, used mainly for sleep, helps the body link the bed with rest. A regular time to get up, even after a poor night, keeps the body clock steady.

Keeping the practice the same each night, in the same chair, at roughly the same time, with the same five parts, turns it into a signal that sleep is near.

Tonight we practised in dim light, with a slower moving part and a longer closing that led straight to bed. In our next lesson, we will look at what to do when you wake in the night and sleep does not return at once.